It isn’t an easy decision to make. To decide whether or not to extend your already lovely little family by one more. Some could call you crazy for even thinking about it when your children are seven and (almost) five years old. Some would think you were mad for wanting to go back to square one, to start all over again. Some would ask you why you would want to go back to the sleepless nights, dirty nappies and sore nipples. I understand that it doesn’t sound that glamorous and I would probably find it harder now, now I am a little older and a little more used to an easier way of life. But it just doesn’t make sense to me to not have another little human in our family, to love. It isn’t for a number, an ideal goal… but because Matt and I love raising our children.…

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I anxiously sat on the wall outside of the doctors surgery, my head hung low and my legs swayed over the edge. Passers by looked up at me. They looked up at this grown woman with her hair shoved in to two braids, wearing her beloved off-white, incredibly scuffed converses and a small, brown backpack from Primark (where da kidz get their clothes)… I think she selected such a style because she didn’t have the strength to deal with this shit, almost as if she was mirroring somebody she used to be, a long time ago…before she had a care in the world. Honestly, I felt them look at me with pity in their eyes, almost with a little sadness. It made sense…because I felt sad and I obviously looked it. I had a ping of panic in my chest when I caught their glances… Like…Did they know that I…

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Hellooooo Everyone (Yep still feels odd!) Today’s Blog may be a little long Guys and it wasn’t the one I was really planning but I couldn’t not put it on here today.  As you may know I have two children, I love them both equally in very different ways because they are both unique (Obviously!) but today I wanted to write about my first born Son. His name is Noah and he is 4 years old, nearly five (he can not wait to be five!).  I had Noah when I was just 22… some say still a baby myself, I disagree. Noah and I are very close, we have a great relationship. Regardless of how young I was, I had already decided what I wanted for Noah, myself and our relationship since before he was born. I could not wait to meet him! This morning I have watched him closely,…

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