Dear Noah, Tomorrow you are turning seven! Tonight I am sitting here having just written in your birthday card and I am surrounded by banners and balloons that say ‘Happy Seventh Birthday’ and it doesn’t feel like they belong in our home. I can’t look at the number and see you being this age. I feel like some time has been rather wickedly stolen from me and I will never see it again. But it’s all true. You will be seven. In just a few hours…and I am trying to catch up quickly. I need to catch up so that tomorrow morning, when you bundle in to bed with me and whisper that it is your birthday, I don’t fall apart. I feel like falling apart right now. My lips keep quivering quite hard, my eyes are full of tears…my face is a little contorted…because I am trying to push…

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